Q & A's

I've got a random list of questions my publisher sent and I'll answer them here and store the answers permanently on the site (probably under "other writing" or maybe a FAQ section. So here are the first four:

If you were granted you one wish, what would you wish for?

World peace.

If you won the lottery, what would you do with your newfound wealth?

World peace.

[What? No? Maybe a little corner of world peace? Surely a lotto win of a kajillion dollars would get a corner? Oh. Right. The dollar is dropping.

How about a smidge? I could do with a smidge. And if that’s too much, then can we get that guy—you know, the one who is determined to start shouting at four a.m. in some drunken rant about mice and how they have been totally overlooked as a source of protein and then he goes outside and starts up a chainsaw, yes, him—can we get him some Prozac? Or time alone on an island? That would be a nice start.]

[Some of you reading this are shaking your heads, thinking she’d totally go for the 911 Carrera S Cabriolet but noooo. I would never buy the S. That would be ecologically wrong. And bad. Like brownies.] [But I might stand there a long time and look at it pitifully.]

Besides being an author, what is your fantasy job?

World peace hero.

[Oh, you totally knew I was going to go there, didn’t you?]

What do you enjoy doing the most with your free time?

Wait a minute. There’s free time? As in… free? Seriously? When did this start? Who do I see about this? This is a trick, isn’t it, like where someone sets a plate of brownies out there just for the taking with a sign that says “100% calorie free, tastes great” and then you reach for one and that’s when they cuff you and cart you off because anyone insane enough to believe that anything can still taste great and be calorie free has clearly lost every single marble they were given to play with and needs to be locked up for their own safety.

I am not falling for this one again.